The Lynnster Zone

babbling since february 1997

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I’m As Tired of This Woe Is Me Stuff As You Probably Are, But Bear With Me Another Sec

Posted by Lynnster on June 26, 2009

So one of the things I’d been meaning to write about this week was sort of a little clarification to what my situation is/has been. I know (especially after talking with KathyT this morning, and talking with her and Aunt B. and Kat Coble in recent weeks, though I can kind of tell from what Kathy said today that I probably don’t really understand the full scope of all this just yet) – anyway, I know there’s been some stuff going on on my behalf, more or less, and I really don’t have words to express the gratitude and appreciation I feel about that, no matter what Kathy is bringing to me Sunday. When it comes to things like that I pretty much just dissolve into tears and sniffles, I’m worthless that way.

Anyway, that said – even though I know anyone and everyone involved would probably insist I don’t owe anyone any explanations – I feel like I still need to sort of clarify some things and attempt to explain a little, or at least some of what I possibly can publicly, about how and why things got this bad. Unfortunately there’s not a whole lot I can really go into here on the blog, for several reasons.

As many of you will remember, things were already kind of bad and shaky prior to last fall, though looking back NOW, those struggles look like a piece of cake compared to what I’ve been dealing with the last many months.

The best way I really know how to explain what’s happened now is for those of you that have traditional jobs, or have had them up until recently, to imagine not getting paid since, say, October or November. Or imagine only getting paid enough every month to pay your rent or house payment.

That’s pretty much exactly what I’ve been dealing with, more or less. I can’t really say more publicly – not because of anything illegal, or anything of that sort – just out of respect for other people’s feelings due to the circumstances, I am choosing not to talk about it at length publicly. I have shared more of the details with a few, and if I know you, I’m happy to forward a copy of the e-mail I sent in those cases, or they can, or whatever, or we’ll talk about it over a meal sometime if I ever get to Nashville again or whatever. I don’t mind my friends knowing more about the situation, I’m just not going to blog about it on that public level.

But that’s pretty much what happened, and I’ve been scrambling ever since trying not to drown under what’s been a flood of never-ending stress and anxiety and I suppose terror, even, because of all the behind-ness that situation has wrought. All that behind-ness usually made even worse because, for a while there, every month would roll around and something still wouldn’t have been taken care of, so now there was an urgent need to get this paid or that paid – which has meant ongoing late fees and, on several occasions, overdraft fees trying to keep something or another from getting canceled or cut off. I’ve probably paid another year’s worth or more of car payments alone just in late fees all these months, but there was nothing else that could be done about it.

In all the cutting back and cutting out, somewhat fortunately I guess there were a few things that weren’t an issue when things grew so dire. I actually cut out cable a few years ago, when I still had a regular paycheck coming in, because I was spending so much more time online anyway and everything I watched much was available online, I just really couldn’t justify shelling out that kind of money every month anymore.

Same thing with my cell service. I’ve never been a big cell phone user and mainly carry mine for emergency purposes more than anything else. I couldn’t justify all that contract money anymore so I went to cheap and prepaid ages ago, and not only have been all the better for it but have more coverage than I did with my previous provider anyway and rarely any of the problems I had before with dropped calls and such. My mom has used the same prepaid service for years so now that’s just part of my birthday present every year, air time, and I never use a whole year’s worth in a year anyway.

So those were not issues – everything else has been, in any case. My mom wasn’t going to let me starve or anything, and has gone far and beyond the call of duty again and again and again all these months trying to help save me from disaster, to the point where she really has no extra to keep sparing. What I hate the most is that, for months and months, she believed everything was going to be okay the next month because I thought it was going to be – only for that month to come around and nope, and there we’d be scrambling to keep my utilities from getting turned off or this paid or that paid. She didn’t go on her usual vacation last year because of me, and if it weren’t for Social Security kicking in this year, I’d probably already be homeless and she would not be on vacation right now. Then there’s the boyfriend who is unable to work right now and wants nothing more than to be able to provide for me/us, and maybe in a couple of years we will be a two-income family and all of this current stuff will just be a bad memory – but that’s then, and this is now, and now sucks.

Anyway, as I wrote before, after this many months of struggling like this, it had gotten to be end of the rope time, there was nothing left. Have sold almost everything I had left to sell other than the one thing(s) that are the only “family heirloom” type thing that is just mine, no one else’s, that I have left, stuff I mentioned in a recent post – and that may well still go, and is not worth all that much anyway. Well, there is one other thing, but I’ve got to get up home to be able to do that and haven’t really been looking forward to dealing with that anyway (i.e., potentially shipping some things that are very, very breakable) and am actually probably going to make a blog post about it next week – this is something that is not only a pain to think about selling and shipping via eBay or something, but is also something really only a small percentage of people would be interested in owning. I’m thinking with the power of the Internet, I might find that person between now and Christmas and solve this problem; otherwise, it’ll be going up on eBay probably about the time people start Christmas shopping.

But yeah, really, like I said – think about your job, if you have one. And then think about not getting paid or only getting paid one bill’s worth every month since last fall, and that’s pretty much right where I am, and have been.

Other possibilities – there’s so many people going for every job that comes up, and a friend of mine here in town who is in charge of hiring where she is told me lately it’s nothing like it has ever been. Instead of 25 or 50 resumes coming in for every job she posts, she’s getting 200. Then there’s the other ones – the ones I’m way overqualified for and so is most everyone else – someone I know who hires for a place like that put it this way: why would he hire anyone that’s likely to leave as soon as the economy gets better or something else comes up? He, too, is seeing hundreds of applications for every position that opens, and in the case of his business, he says about 90% of them are overqualified, or maybe qualified to have HIS job – but not the position that’s open.

But the other thing is – and I think maybe there are some others out there that missed this, because Kathy didn’t realize it, though I know not everyone missed it because several, including The Awesomest Squirrel Queen in the World, commented on it when I mentioned it before – I actually AM working, besides what I have not been paid for. I actually really like my new gig doing QA work, it doesn’t pay much but it’s steady, but at least it does pay SOMETHING. I also do some other freelance work to bring in a little, and then there’s my other venture, which many of you have been aware of for a while, which is still continuing to steadily grow, though penny by penny, and that’s pretty much literally. It is growing, however, and I’ve built a foundation of what should (unless the whole industry hoses) continue to be residual income that grows. As it is, what started out as a little venture with big plans brought in over a year’s time what would have been nice “extra” money… if it hadn’t almost been my ONLY money.

I really do almost nothing BUT work to bring in what little I do – if I’m not working on one thing, it’s something else, or something else, or doing QA work, all day every day. Sleep for three or four hours, get up and scramble to bring in some money some more. Just been a constant ongoing thing and probably needless to say, I stay exhausted.

But I am, much like I said before, finally at a point where if I can just get a grip on the backlog, getting by month to month again is within my reach. It may require 80 hours a week of doing QA reviews, but I’m finally to a point where being able to get by every month, even if it’s just barely squeaking by, is possible.

But that’s what’s so frustrating about all this backlog that has just been stacking up and stacking up all these months struggling through this and staying perpetually behind – two months behind on this bill, a month behind on that bill, every once in a while three months behind and barely saving myself before cutoff/cancellations or losing everything. That much stress and anxiety is not good for anyone and it’s just consumed me daily for months and been downright frightening plenty – I probably need to be on medication at this point but much like my glasses that have needed to be replaced for a couple of years now, teeth that need to be fixed, my stupid broken windshield that got broken while sitting in my driveway during a storm (yep, that’s my luck) and some other stuff that I have just had to put on hold (including stuff people normally absolutely do not NOT pay every year – read into that what you want and you’re probably right) – well, anything extraneous is just out of the question completely right now. My glasses may be all scratched up and my prescription’s probably long since changed again, but as long as I can see out of them, whatever, and I still have a partial supply of contacts left from a few years ago that probably also need a prescription change, but for going out of the house purposes, they’ll do just fine until I can actually do something about it all again.

Anyway, so there you have it, what I can say publicly anyway, and I don’t want to keep going on about it here but it’s sort of my understanding that several people have been involved in trying to help and even though I really don’t know the full scope of it all yet, I just wanted to clarify and better outline a little more than I did before, maybe. Especially in trying to give an example of what it really is I’ve been dealing with, and also – especially after realizing that Kathy didn’t realize I am working at all – to clarify that I am doing work, and doing other things to try and fix all this. It’s just not much money, but at least it’s a little.

I’m also going to do something that I never intended to do, but it was suggested to me by someone else that maybe I ought to put a donation button on the blog in case there were those that wanted to help but didn’t want to take a chance on embarrassing me by asking, or whatever. Believe me, at this point with things as bad as they’ve gotten and after months and months of struggling and dealing with this stuff, I’m beyond any embarrassment or anything of the sort about accepting any help and stuff. I know some have already done plenty and they’ve done enough, and I’m not going to think anything negative about anyone who doesn’t, but for anyone else who just happens along and wants to, or has, I’m humbled and beyond words when it comes to appreciation and gratitude of those who do or have. So there it is and I’ll be putting it in the sidebar to stay, I guess.

I just can’t really put into words how not only depressing but just plain frightening it’s all been. My anxiety and stress levels have been so high and so constantly for so long, and with a pretty huge family history of both stroke and heart disease, even all the more frightening to be that stressed out all the time. There was a very scary couple or three days in December that I really don’t ever want to relive again, and I’d like to think I’m handling all that anxiety and depression a little better than I was at that particular time, but then there’s weeks like last week, when ’round about Wednesday evening, it occurred to me that the reason I was feeling sick and dizzy was probably because I hadn’t really realized it, but I had spent most of the last three days holding my breath repeatedly because I was so worried about how I was going to take care of what needed to be paid that week. That kind of anxiety.

I just want to be able to breathe again, and not be in a constant state like that almost 24/7 for weeks and months at a time. And be able to sleep more than a fitful three or four hours waking up worrying some more. And maybe only spend, say, 18 hours a day desperately trying to make some income instead of 20 or 22. That would be an improvement.

I do know this. I may not have much else left at this point, but my family and loved ones, and friends blogger and non-blogger alike, and an awful lot of acquaintances as well – you’re all just treasures. I wish I had the right words to fully express how grateful I am and how much I appreciate and heart all of you, but as I said above, times like that, words just start failing me and I just start getting teary-eyed and sniffly instead. So please just know I do. If you’re reading this, then you are most likely one of those treasures and you’re just so fabulous I have no words left to say but that I’m proud to know you and that you crossed my path, wherever and however you did. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Posted in a family thing, blah, blogfolks, friends are good, my so-called life, the economy sucks | 2 Comments »

Twitter Twisters

Posted by Lynnster on June 16, 2009

So, here I sit on the western side of the state, where there hasn’t been a raindrop all day, once yet again witnessing on Twitter while all my friends in Nashville are Tweeting about the tornadoes/storms/whatever coming through there once yet again. Deja vu.

Of course, we just had our own little dance with straight line winds last Friday that took out a good bit of Memphis greenery, and again on Sunday. I had not gotten out of the house since before the weekend, and was quite shocked yesterday to discover a tree about the size of my house fully uprooted and laying in the yard of someone’s home around the corner from me and about six or seven houses down, not to mention the landscape dotted with trees through roofs of various houses on my route to the grocery store. There wasn’t, like, this massive and constant scene of destruction like with Hurricane Elvis or the infamous ice storm of ‘94, but there was at least one house on every street between my house and Kroger that had (or had had) a tree stuck in its roof.

As for Middle Tennessee, the wrath of Mother Nature is still winding its way through and I’m watching various friends Tweeting and checking in either to say everything’s okay, or they’re headed for cover, or it’s passed and look at this poor demolished tree in Aunt B.’s yard. (She’s more upset about the power being out, though, as would I be – it’s frickin’ hot down here for June right now.)

I don’t know what’s worse – being smack in the middle of one, or watching like this from afar when people you care about could be in danger. Well, I do know what’s worse, but they’re both pretty bad. My mom can probably relate to the latter – I’m sure the 15-20 minutes or so between the first call and my second call to her wasn’t fun the night I got stuck in one of Tennessee’s most severe tornadoes of all time. First I called her from the interstate to ask if they were saying on TV there was a tornado warning; 20 minutes or so later, I was calling back to report I was okay, save for my tornado-pummeled and totaled car with the completely cracked windshield.

I did agree with a commenter somewhere or another on one of the Memphis media sites that it was rather laughable how the tornado sirens in the center city went off AFTER the storm had passed through on Friday.

Glancing at Twitter again. Aunt B. reporting that her neighbor’s car is under a tree. Fun, fun.

Quote that made me giggle of the day: @jimreams (the entity formerly known as the Nashville Knucklehead): I’m glad I live in South Nashville. Tornadoes don’t speak Spanish.

Posted in about the weather, blah, blogfolks, friends are good, middle tennessee, nashville, natural disasters, the internet is..., west tennessee | Leave a Comment »

Kitties in Middle Tennessee – Get One

Posted by Lynnster on June 15, 2009

LeBlanc has baby kittens that need a home and are as cute as can be. He and the Missus wound up with eleven and successfully found homes for most, but two cute little tabby girls are still in need of a home. They are somewhat inexplicably named Clint Eastwood and Paul Stanley at present (heh), but I feel certain he won’t mind if they receive new feminine names upon adoption, if one so desires.

Most likely if you are anywhere in the Middle Tennessee area and in need of kittenage, he’ll be happy to work something out. Get in touch with him if interested.

Posted in blogfolks, cats, middle tennessee, nashville | 2 Comments »

I Might Be Typing This in My Sleep, But Probably Not

Posted by Lynnster on June 15, 2009

Thursday was an odd day. First and foremost, it would have been my father’s 67th birthday, if he were alive.

The annual big Relay for Life event was in my hometown over the weekend, and the paper has been publishing the list of donations for luminarias as they come in for about the past month – donations made in memory of those who died from cancer or related illnesses, in honor of cancer survivors, and this year, in honor of caretakers. Well, Thursday was also the day that my father’s name appeared as one of those donated in memory of (by a relative of mine). Not so surprising, though somewhat ironic as far as what day it was.

The paper also publishes snippets of news from bygone days frequently – 25 years ago, 50 years ago, 75 years ago, and sometimes earlier. What was really kind of odd was that 50 years ago, on that same day, the paper showed him and a group of other young men from the county preparing to leave for Castle Heights Military Academy in Lebanon to attend that year’s Boys State session.

I don’t know. It was just kind of an odd day all around.

I want to thank everyone for the kind notes they’ve been leaving; I could never put into words how very much they are appreciated. There are several of you I have been meaning to e-mail personally for days now, but the kinds of hours I’ve been keeping, and time I’ve been spending lately scrambling around as I have trying to slow down this impending disaster – I sleep at weird times, and when I’m not asleep I’m usually snowed under, and my actual working schedule is usually overnights, so I’m usually awake when everyone else is not and vice versa. Except I also will just (when I’m not doing shift work) go for several hours, pass out for two or three or four hours, get up and go some more trying to get stuff done. But many of you will hear from me personally soon, I promise (and KathyT, I did e-mail you and hope you got it, sorry it took five days before I heard the voice mail, oops).

And thanks to many especially for the kind words about Dobie. He was here for so long, and still my “baby puppy” even when he was old and his health failing, and it’s still very hard to believe that he’s really gone. I have a very nice picture to share that my mom took at Christmas when I had to take him with me because of his failing condition, which has wound up being the last taken of so very many that were taken of him over fifteen years. But I can’t really look at it much yet, so I’ll save it for a day when I can.

I probably need to write some more about all the horrible stuff that’s going on and why things have disintegrated to the disastrous point they have, but I’m not really sure how to put it into words here because there’s really only so much I can say publicly – and for good reasons. But it sucks, because for those same reasons, I’ve sort of been stuck fighting this battle on my own almost, and with no one I could really be open with about the details other than my very closest family and friends.

But I will do all of that soon. Unfortunately a good bit of this week is going to be focused on probably selling what little I have left that is worth anything at all (not much, but a little) that is truly just mine – a few things that would have been, I guess you’d say, family heirloom-type stuff if I were leaving anything behind one day. Not that I’m likely going to have children or anything like that at this point, but you know – stuff I never dreamed I’d ever be forced to part with, not like this. I guess if I outlive my mom (doubtful), there’s still a houseful of family things – but nothing that’s just mine, except these few things it looks like I’m going to have to part with.

It’s not much – I guess that’s the worst joke of all about all this stuff, I’m not dealing with thousands upon thousands here and it’d probably be a whole lot easier to swallow if that were the case – but no, there’s only about a grand or two standing between me and complete disaster. Much less than 2K, really, more like about 1.5. That’s the part that really stinks, that in the grand scheme of things, it’s not really all that much. But the problem is now I’ve run out of time is all.

In trying to think things through – and coming to the conclusion there were really no more options anymore but the one thing I have tried for over a year now NOT to have to do – it’s occurred to me that no matter how tough things might be right now, that really doesn’t bother me nearly as much as thinking about how I’m going to feel about it all a year from now, or two years from now, or five or ten years from now – when presumably things will probably be better, but stuff that meant something to me – things bought with me in mind and given to me for very specific reasons – will be gone. And I just can’t even let myself think about all that right now.

Anyway, this week will be busy busy – and I need to get going now as it is, much to do and much to finish – but I’m going to try and keep at the blog again, even if it’s just stupid stuff. Aside from all the awfulness of late, there’s also some really funny stuff I’ve been saving up to share. And I’ll be trying to get some personal e-mailing done this week and next too, some of you I’d been meaning to touch base with anyway and either the constant need-to-do-this or constant passing out cold from exhaustion kept waylaying. So will speak to many of you soon, and will definitely be back here shortly, as soon as I wrap up one big project that has tied me up for months. ’til then…

Posted in a family thing, ancient history, blah, blogfolks, dobie is a dog, dogs, friends are good, in memory of..., my luck sucks, my so-called life, west tennessee | Leave a Comment »

Merry Merry

Posted by Lynnster on December 25, 2008

I think this is the first time in my life I have ever been alone on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  It won’t last – my sister couldn’t leave Nebraska until after work Wednesday, so Christmas for us is pushed back a day, my Christmas Eve will technically be tonight and Christmas Day tomorrow.  In fact, I’m on my way out of town shortly today to get that ball rolling.

Several days ago, I wrote about my frustration and sadness about not really being able to “participate” in Christmas for the second year in a row.  After I’d posted that, my godmother, who I love dearly, commented that it didn’t matter how many presents we had or did not have and that we would all still have a good Christmas and enjoy being with each other and laughing and having fun like usual, and well, she’s right, that’s all true.  But I still can’t help but be frustrated and sad that I couldn’t do much, and what Newscoma wrote the other day about her own Christmas pretty much hit the nail on the head for me too when it comes to Christmas:

This year is a lean, mean Christmas but I’ve gotten into the spirit to a degree. No, there isn’t any big ticket items. People are getting small gifts that I tried to put some meaning into. I’m a gifty person. I like seeing people’s faces when they open their presents. I’m weird.

That’s always been the fun for me as well, at least ever since I was old enough to do my own Christmas shopping.  You won’t find socks and underwear under the tree in our family – well, you will, but they’re the least important – we do gifts that others would probably think silly and certainly unconventional, but everybody gets stuff they really wanted (and some stuff they didn’t but are resigned to getting every year, like my brother-in-law getting sheep in various forms – a family in-joke) and we have a blast.  I like getting just the perfect things for people and seeing their faces when they open their presents, that’s the big thing for me.

And ever since my parents got divorced, my main priority has always been making sure my Mom gets the stuff she wanted.  And I couldn’t do much of either this year, and it depressed me.

As it turned out, I actually was a little better off than I thought I was.  I thought I only had one thing to give one person, and as I was getting things together getting ready to go out of town and kept finding things I’d forgotten about – including something my mother was supposed to have gotten for Christmas probably two or three years ago – I actually wound up with one gift for each person that will be at our family Christmas.  So I guess that’s better, but I’m still pretty frustrated and depressed about it all.

Really when it comes down to it, I’m about at the end of my rope in general.  Last week I spent three days in such depression, fear, and panic about just everything in general that when things improved just a little bit and I felt a little bit better, it was really concerning to me just how bad it had gotten.  It’s a little bit scary to get that far down.  A lot of those things that people will say things like, “I don’t know how he/she could have done that”, things I used to be able to say – I know why people do those things now.  I can tell you for a fact that if you get knocked down and desperate enough, things that may cross your mind, if only for a fleeting moment, are the kinds of things you never would have thought would do so.

But I don’t know, for some reason I’m still here, although sometimes I wonder if the only reason I haven’t just thrown up my hands and given up yet is because somebody’s got to take care of the pets, and if I weren’t here… well, the cats would probably be taken care of, but I know what would happen to my dogs, and it wouldn’t be what I would want.

So I just keep going, but I’m so tired of all the panic and anxiety and not knowing anything every month – how is this going to get paid, how is that going to get paid, how am I going to be able to eat next week, etc.  The car insurance and phone/Internet miraculously got paid this month – which the latter, you know, I’d probably do without too, but without Internet, then there’s NO income at all.

I still don’t know how the car payment’s getting made this month or catching up on the utility bill, and then January will come and all the panic just start’s all over again.  Right now I only have one for sure, every month, monthly check coming in and it will only cover either rent, car insurance, or car payment, so that’s what I consider my rent check.  The rest is pretty much all up in the air every month right now, which is just… yeah, panic-inducing, frustrating, and depressing.

But for a couple of days anyway, I’m just going to attempt to enjoy what there is of Christmas this year and put the rest behind me for a little while.  There will be plenty of time after Saturday for the panic and worrying again, so I’m going to see what little bit of Christmas spirit I can muster up and go with it.

Dobie is not doing very well at all and just had a bath today – which just made him all the more furious with me – my Mom doesn’t know it yet, but he’s coming to visit for Christmas too (thus the bath).  I’m hoping hanging out in a warm house with carpet and a bed to sleep in all by himself with me for a couple of nights, and some turkey and who knows what all else there will be, will perk him up a little bit, or at least make what I am fairly certain now are his last days a little nicer.  He hasn’t shown much interest in food lately, but I kind of expect he will be thrilled about the turkey and whatever scraps.  Sure, table scraps aren’t really good for dogs, but he’s old and he’s dying, as far as I’m concerned he can eat whatever he wants (and whatever he WILL eat).

It seems like this year has just been a never-ending cycle of bad news.  Times have been so tough lately and not just for me, seems like half of nearly everyone I know has been going through something or other – friends losing jobs recently, another recently finding out hers will be terminated at the end of the year, others losing family members here right at Christmas.  It’s just all got to get better sometime, doesn’t it?

Anyway, I hope everyone who stops by here had a really super nice Christmas.  Some of you I miss so much and hope to see in the coming months.  In the meantime, I am on my way in a couple of hours for my own Christmasing, scanty though it is this year.  See you again soon.

Posted in a family thing, blah, blogfolks, dobie is a dog, dogs, friends are good, holidays, lynnster's zoo, my so-called life | 3 Comments »

Super Ultra Extra Comfy

Posted by Lynnster on December 23, 2008

I love this.

It would be sort of the same at my house if I had a mattress on the living room floor, except there would be four more dogs there and a smattering of felines.  B’s cats were apparently fairly uninterested, though.

Posted in * dog photos, blogfolks, cats, dogs, holidays, lynnster's zoo, other people's lives | 2 Comments »

Dum-Dums, I Hardly Knew Ye

Posted by Lynnster on November 4, 2008

So I’m not going to talk about the election anymore because really, again, I’m sick to death of it.  And I’m trying to lighten up the mood around here a little, or else Mack is gonna start calling me “Debbie Downer” instead of Rachel.

So I’m going to share with you some new discoveries on one of my FAVORITE subjects today – hard candy.  And when I say hard candy, I don’t mean Sarah Palin, nope.

I haven’t had any trick-or-treaters for years, but I wasn’t about to get caught on Halloween without candy just in case there were some this year.  I almost made the mistake of picking up some nasty cheap yucky stuff I would have hated for $1 a bag, but decided to wait until the next store or two that day.  Because, you know, if I don’t have trick-or-treaters and I buy candy, it might as well be something I like that I will consume eventually.

The next store saved the day with a $2 bag of Dum-Dums – 80 of them.  Yay.

If you’ve read here much, you are well aware that while I don’t much care for chocolate and am not big on sweets as a rule, I have a serious thing for hard candy, mostly on the sour side but a few others.  Jolly Ranchers, Icebreakers Sours, those old Charms Sweet & Sour pops you can barely find anymore – those are the best.  But Dum-Dums have always come a close second.  I just like lollipops period – the Jolly Ranchers suckers are some kinda awesome.

But wow, it must have been a long time since I bought any, because I started pulling suckers out of that bag and was just amazed.  Where did all these new flavors come from?  Coconut, mango, cherry cola, bubble gum, cotton candy – I am in hard candy taste heaven!  (Except for the cherry cola.  I don’t care for that one so much.)  Mom said it sounded like they are trying to match some of the Jelly Belly flavors (which I like as well); probably so.  There along with all the old standards like root beer and tangerine and cherry, and the (slightly newer but I’d had it before) blue raspberry, were all these marvelous new flavors.

I was about to get upset there for a few minutes, though – and was concerned they had stopped making it – but finally fished a cream soda Dum-Dum out of the bag.  Yay!

So there ya go.  I might be basically penniless and destitute and barely able to afford to buy real groceries in the current economy of this Presidential election year, but if I can manage to keep a $2 bag of Dum-Dums on hand, I won’t really even notice if I’m starving.  Ha!  OK, I AM Debbie Downer, sue me – I don’t have anything anyway!

Posted in blogfolks, fun with food, other obsessions | 4 Comments »

Well, Shoot, I Didn’t Get a Sticker Today Either

Posted by Lynnster on November 4, 2008

I told myself I wasn’t going to talk about the election because I’m tired of it all, but since I had to stand in line for nearly an hour and 45 minutes this morning to vote, I must say I am VERY grateful to the nice young lady in front of me in line who filled me in on the 411 on the charter referendums we had here to vote on that were AS BIG AND LONG AS THE ENTIRE STATE OF TENNESSEE (!!!).  Since I have my head stuck in the ground most of the time and don’t have time to read much but hometown newspapers anymore.

And the conversation throughout our wait also distracted me from the nerve injury in my leg, which all of a sudden decided to start acting up bigtime FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MONTHS about ten minutes into standing in line, so I was even more grateful.

This will no doubt disappoint many to hear, but I have it on good authority that always-close-to-100% Democrat Benton County looks to be majority voting for McCain this year, including some of the biggest lifelong Democrats in the county.  Shocking to me but, given that, I suspect I know how most of the numbers in West Tennessee are going to turn out outside of Shelby and Madison Counties.

I noted Newscoma’s Political Boyfriend on the ballot and hope he wins (I’m sure he will).  That’s one person I wouldn’t care if he were a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, or Martian.  He’s a damn fine statesman.

And the one time I had a major issue that bugged me enough to get off my lazy butt and write my local legislators about, now quite some years ago, he was the ONLY one who responded and wrote back.  Little things like that go a long way, and that’s why he’s still actively in office, and the rest of those folks’ names are long forgotten in this town.  Thanks, Steve.

PS – And no, they were not handing out “I Voted” stickers for free donuts or whatever here today.  Boo.

Posted in blogfolks, memphis, politics schmolitics, west tennessee | 2 Comments »

Oh Hai

Posted by Lynnster on August 27, 2008

I am just knee-deep in fifteen tons of stuff right now and don’t really have any time for anything but the HAVE-to stuff right now.  That’s my explanation for the quiet.

Well, that and I don’t really have anything to blog about at the moment.  I could gripe about the fact that I got the phone call last night from the ex that I knew would eventually come (because it always does, eventually) and had dreaded for the last nine years, but I really don’t want to talk (or think) about that either.  It went okay, I suppose, depending on what your definition of okay is.

And a few weeks ago one of my e-mail accounts started getting overloaded suddenly with Greek spam, which I find the phenomena has now wended its way to my blog comments and the Akismet bucket.  Weird.

Other than that, I got nothing.  Newscoma’s down sick this week and posting all kinds of wacky stuff from the newspapers over there as well as other interesting stuff – go visit her and see.

Posted in blogfolks, blogstuff, my so-called life, spam spam spam, the freeloader ex files | 4 Comments »

Rock & Roll Mom vs. The Slacker Nannies

Posted by Lynnster on August 12, 2008

As much as I write (and write and write and write) about The Replacements and Paul Westerberg, I guess one would think I should be writing this on my music blog instead, but I thought I’d write about it over here because it’s not about music and I thought some of you (especially you moms) would dig reading this tale.

Former leader of Zuzu’s Petals, Laurie Lindeen (also known as Mrs. Paul Westerberg) has a blog and recently wrote a funny, yet poignant and kind of pitiful, take on her experience being put in the unwanted position recently of a “nanny narc”. It’s a good read, go check it out (and down with slacker nannies everywhere!).

Posted in blogfolks, giggles, other people's lives, paul westerberg, the replacements | Leave a Comment »

Wanderlust

Posted by Lynnster on August 11, 2008

My friend Julie and I go back a long way. We went to high school together a class apart, then later shared an apartment for a while during college. She was already in Memphis when I moved down here in 1988, and not too long after that gave birth to her first child, which began a journey for her as a single mom that was always simply amazing to me how she hung in through some unbelievably difficult times, but she did it all like a pro.

Since then she’s become a mother twice more, the last born earlier this year, after she’s already been a grandmother for four years. It’s rather tickled me that she’s a year younger than me but the grandmother of a four-year-old (I should be shot, I know). She’s been out in Utah for about 17-18 years now. Many moons have passed since the days of our old apartment up at MTSU where we used to go to sleep at 6 a.m., get up about 6 p.m., watch MTV all night and throw empty beer cans at Martha Quinn whenever she was on.  Oh, and sometimes go to class.

Julie’s always been adventurous in a way I never dared to even think about being. After a period of living and working at Utah’s Seabase, she and hubby decided to pack up the kids, cats, and I dunno what all else in the camper and hit the road and just wander a while. The kids have always been homeschooled, and hubby has a job where he can telecommute, so they’ve been able to just wander as they please this summer. Most recently they’ve headed back to Salt Lake City (where she was forevah) so Julie could do a month-long stint volunteering at The Breastfeeding Cafe events and classes.

She’s been blogging her adventures from the road, and it’s been a really interesting read thus far. So meet my Gypsy friend – she’s taken some really cool photos along the way too.

Posted in ancient history, blogfolks, blogstuff, friends are good | 2 Comments »

Collectively Broken?

Posted by Lynnster on July 31, 2008

I know most of you probably read or heard about the church shooting in Knoxville this past Sunday. I’ve been trying to find the words to comment on it all week, but it’s really been difficult to put thoughts into words in this case.

Different people I have discussed it with have been most struck by different things about it. One was horrified that such a thing happened when children were on stage performing a play. Another has not been able to get the thought of the child who was covered in his mother’s blood out of her head. I was particularly disturbed by the irony that one of the victims wasn’t a member of the church, but of another church in the community, and had come to the church that day to see the kids’ play, and the fact that some of the other victims were visitors from out of town (I heard anyway).

And I guess one of the most disturbing things of all to many people is the fact that obviously you can’t even be sure you can feel safe in church anymore. Of all places.

I think of the church I grew up in – a small town church, but there are many big churches with large memberships in town and the town’s not all THAT small anyway – however, the church I grew up in was pretty small compared to most. Even with a full house, someone with a gun could have taken out the entire congregation and any visitors in a matter of minutes. That just makes my blood run cold and sends shivers down my spine.

As a kid, I spent literally hours in that church, and quite often by myself – with an adult on the grounds, yes, but not necessarily in the general vicinity where I was or even in the same building. But who wouldn’t have thought that wasn’t safe?

I also lived my entire life until I went off to college in houses that were never locked – not my home, not my grandparents’ – unless you went out of town on vacation, and maybe not even then, because it really didn’t matter. From around the second or third grade on, I walked home from school to a home that had been empty and unlocked all day long, and usually spent another two or three hours alone in the house until my parents got home from work. We didn’t lock our cars; we didn’t have to.

And nobody would have thought twice about the fact that I spent countless hours walking or bicycling around the neighborhood or all the way to downtown by myself, also from a pretty young age. Even when 8-year-old Cary Ann Medlin’s body was found raped and mutilated in the woods in a nearby town when I was 13 – a tragedy that Newscoma, my age and growing up in the next town over at the time, referred to the other day in her own thoughts about the Knoxville shootings – still I continued to hoof it around town by myself all the time, albeit with probably some stronger cautionary words about being careful and watching out for myself. Heck, at 13 years old, that was prime time for me walking downtown every week to spend my allowance at the music shop on records and that week’s issue of Rolling Stone.

But you really didn’t HAVE to worry about not being safe, not then, not there, and not even all that much even in the bigger cities. In 18 years, there was the Medlin case, there was the Marcia Trimble abduction and murder in Nashville that was such unusual and big news that, I guarantee you, every single native Tennesseean still alive that’s over the age of 40 not only remembers her name, but can probably tell you exactly what she looked like. Because stuff like that just didn’t happen, not as a rule.

And people in small towns didn’t go around killing each other. I recall one big nasty murder in the county when I was a child, and one when I was in high school. One was killed by someone who had previously worked for him, the other was shot and killed by a man he knew over some argument. Two – TWO – murders in two counties in 18 years.

And now there’ve been more murders than I can count in both those counties over the last ten, fifteen years – not every day, no, but far, far more than two in 18 years, and many of them seemingly arbitrary or random. Kids get abducted and sometimes wind up dead, and it’s still shocking, sure, but not like it once was. Another school shooting happens and you’re appropriately horrified, but no longer all that surprised.

And now people are walking into churches on Sunday mornings and shooting and killing people. If you can’t be sure you’re safe in school, or in church – where, then, can you feel safe?

Of course, now I live in a city where murders happen every week and I hear gunshots pretty much every day just about now, so I’m even more numbed and jaded by the constant influx of violence and crime. But that’s why the horrible things that keep happening back home – and even in Knoxville, which is not crime free, of course, but nowhere near the percentage Memphis is – that’s why these things bother me even more. Stuff happens here that’s not supposed to happen up there, or there.

Would the church shooting have been as shocking and people so horrified if it had happened in Memphis? Sure, of course it would have. But I don’t know that many would have been all that surprised, sad to say, especially the rest of our fellow Tennesseans. People from up yonder where I’m from, other than a very small handful, they don’t come to Memphis to shop or to see doctors or for entertainment like they used to. They go to Nashville instead, or even just to Jackson. It’s really pretty sad.

I am grateful that nobody I knew was at the church the other day in Knoxville, but plenty of folks I’m acquainted with did have friends or family that were there, and even one or two that are members that weren’t there that day. That doesn’t make it any less disturbing or sad.

And when I heard from someone in Knoxville about a comment someone they know made – someone who is a member of a large Baptist church in West Knoxville, and quite possibly the same one my future mother-in-law attends every Sunday – the comment being something along the lines of well, you know those people in that church practice witchcraft – I just felt sick.

My future mother-in-law – the Baptist churchgoer – used to be involved in programs that were held at the TVUU church weekly, and had just been telling me on the phone the day before what a nice church it was, and how lovely and wonderful all the people she knew there always had been. In fact, it turns out one of her other sons – one of my future brothers-in-law – used to be a member of that very church.  Maybe still is technically and still on their rolls, though he doesn’t really go anymore.

Witchcraft. I mean, please. Granted, it wasn’t the Baptists or the Methodists or the Presbyterians or a super well-known sect, and it wasn’t even the Catholics, who goodness knows have been accused of lots of whacked out things in thousands of years. But witchcraft? Don’t be stupid. Google before you go shooting off at the mouth. I mean, Wikipedia’s right there.

The ignorance in this country seems to be at an overall all-time high, and safety’s at a premium, obviously. If you can even say safety exists anymore, when you can’t be safe in church on Sunday.

People are having to choose between buying groceries and putting gas in their car, and at the same time, people are getting laid off from their jobs left and right, businesses are closing, and not too many that still have jobs are reporting that their salaries are going up along with the cost of everything else that’s going up.

When does it all end? Where does it stop?

There’s an election coming up, but is anybody who could really change things really going to do something about it all?

I wonder. Something’s got to give. When things break, you fix them. Are we, collectively, broken enough yet?

Posted in ancient history, blogfolks, east tennessee, in my head, knoxville, memphis, middle tennessee, nashville, outraged, politics schmolitics, simply horrified, specifically southern, tennessee in general, west tennessee | 3 Comments »

In That Short Bus Kinda Way

Posted by Lynnster on July 31, 2008

So yeah, I have been blogging for almost eleven and a half years, and just last night I registered over at BlogHer.

Uh huh, I’m a little bit slow sometimes.

Also, I got involved in a comment discussion this week about a subject I never ever in my life thought I would be discussing with a group of people online.  I can’t tell you what it was about nor where it is because most of you can’t see it anyway, but suffice it to say I am still a little bit weirded out about just how bizarre it was to find myself in such a discussion, albeit with a fine group of folks.  Life is really strange sometimes, not necessarily in a bad way, just bizarre.

Posted in blogfolks, blogstuff, friends are good, the internet is..., weird wild & whoa! | 2 Comments »

Go Buy Up All That Milk & Bread, Nashville

Posted by Lynnster on July 8, 2008

I should probably put some gas in my car and drive to Nashville tonight, because it’s been like 90-something degrees here for days (my car’s outside temp gauge on Sunday read 101), and some snow and ice might be nice for a change.

Duh.

(HT: nitweet @ Twitter and Nashvillest)

On another note – does anyone know what’s happened to Short&Fat?  I am still in Rex L. withdrawal and now this disappearance of S&F has me pouting.

Posted in about the weather, blogfolks, giggles, middle tennessee, nashville, weird wild & whoa! | Leave a Comment »

No News is… No News

Posted by Lynnster on July 1, 2008

Wow, I am so shocked about something I just read in my hometown newspaper, I’m almost speechless; and, in fact, jumped over here to write about it while I’m still processing the shock before I finished reading the rest of the paper (or the rest of the article, for that matter).

Yesterday it was announced that the Tennessean is cutting service to ten counties west of Dickson. I probably shouldn’t be quite as surprised as I am, as we’ve been discussing media matters (as in old school vs. current technology) here around the regional blogosphere for some time now, and I guess the writing’s been on the wall – especially now, with these outrageous fuel costs in this country. Still, the actuality of this has me stunned.

I wasn’t all that surprised a little over a week ago when my hometown newspaper announced that The Commercial Appeal, Memphis’ daily newspaper, was going to cease circulation in my home county (and, I would assume, my other home county next door where I went to high school). This is strictly my opinion, but I think the CA shot itself in the foot a few years ago – a foot that was already tenuous, at best, in Northwest Tennessee – when the decision was made to decrease news coverage of most anything north of Jackson.

Initially, that included the obituaries, which was about the only reason I still subscribed to the print version of the CA the last ten years that I did, so I could keep up with things like that that I needed to know back home. A little later – and after what I would assume were many complaints (I know they received two for sure) – they revised the decision a bit and began to re-include that region in the obituaries, but they never did quite get back up to speed with it and they frequently missed a lot, and pretty much the same with the news in general.

It just never did quite get back to speed and return to being the “overall” regional coverage and inclusion of all things not only Memphis but the broad surrounding area that, frankly, to me was always far superior to The Tennessean until maybe seven or eight years ago. I stopped subscribing to home delivery in the early part of this decade, partially due to the rising cost and the convenience of being able to read it online anyway, but mainly because of the decrease in regional coverage from north of Jackson. The decrease in general news coverage was actually pretty gradual over time, but the day they killed the obituaries was probably the death knell for a lot of people with the CA - both those living in Northwest Tennessee and those of us with a vested interest in the region.

So it’s not really a surprise to me that the CA is quitting Northwest Tennessee. I expect there were very few home delivery subscribers – if any – left, and doubt there were many buying it out of what few CA stands were still left around up yonder.

And when it comes down to it, like I said, the CA’s foothold in the region has probably always been tenuous at best because that’s basically a Nashville news area – just about smack in the middle of the two, but just a little closer to Nashville and (more importantly, probably) an area which has been served by Nashville television and radio lo these many years. Before other stations started creeping in and then cable just exploded into a million channels, you had the three big Nashville network affiliates plus the PBS station, and then the alternate network stations in Paducah, Cape Girardeau, Jackson, and the other PBS station in Lexington, and that was it. You had to get closer to Jackson to get Memphis TV stations.

So, being almost all Nashville news towns TV-wise, that area has always been pretty pro-Tennessean vs. The Commercial Appeal as well, so – again – the CA’s demise in that area’s not surprising. You had people who subscribed to both – we did, my family – but we were likely in the minority. We actually subscribed for years to home delivery of the CA daily and Sunday, and only subscribed to the Sunday Tennessean, but then again we had a daily paper in town most of my life. Until about six or seven years ago, anytime I was at home visiting, I went out on Sundays I was there and picked up both the Memphis and Nashville papers. Our preference for the CA was probably partially due to my parents both having gone to college in Memphis, but also I think we just generally all agreed the CA was superior to the Tennessean.

But that’s not at all true of most folks up there; like I said, those are mostly pro-Tennessean towns just west and just east of the Tennessee River, so I’m just really shocked that the paper is going to discontinue all service up there – not even in stores or on the paper racks. And so soon on the heels of the CA’s same decision, and especially when the Tennessean’s always been so far ahead of the CA in popularity (and, one would assume, sales). But in this case, I guess better sales (for whatever that was worth in this day and age) no longer makes up for the astronomical rise in fuel costs, as well as other expenses.

But even though I haven’t actually resided in Northwest Tennessee since 1985, it is kind of freaking me out to think of both those papers not being there – at least the Sunday editions. This is actually a pretty large area we’re talking about and – man. It’s weird to think about, and it’s going to also be really strange not to see newspaper racks around up there (or at least not but a couple).

If I wasn’t so hyper-aware of the issue, maybe I wouldn’t even notice they’re not around anymore, I don’t know. But right now I’m just picturing in my head the sight of outside the post office in downtown Paris, by the door of all the convenience stores in Paris and Camden, the racks by the cash register of dozens of other stores – all those places that I knew, if I wanted (or needed) to run out and get a Sunday Tennessean or CA, they’d be there. And now they won’t be. And that’s weird.

So that pretty much leaves a fairly large area without a large newspaper service, not even on Sunday. Well, there is one large-ish paper – if you could even call it that – not as big as the other two, still around (for now). But if you can’t be nice, and all that, you know. That’s why I’m not going to say anything else at all about that one.

I don’t know. It’s weird. I think we’ve all sort of seen this coming, but just now with this it really and truly seems like the real beginning of the end of an era now, to me anyway, and that’s of course from a total layman’s point of view. But not only am I just freaked out about what if I am back home and want a Sunday paper and have to drive an hour in either direction to get one, of course; I’m concerned for the friends (like this one and this one and this one and this one) and family who are right at the heart of it all too.

No Sunday papers in a ten-county area, gas prices looking like they’re pushing towards five bucks a gallon, and I just noticed my dog’s usual (and previously relatively inexpensive) dog food has gone up nearly an entire four dollars a bag. My salary’s certainly taken a big hit this year catastrophically – and I’m obviously not a “normal” case – but even if I was still working the same job, I’m pretty sure my salary wouldn’t have gone up much (if at all), and I imagine many others are in the same boat. What’s next? I’m honestly beginning to dread to even wonder.

Posted in blogfolks, memphis, middle tennessee, nashville, tennessee in general, the economy sucks, weird wild & whoa!, west tennessee | 4 Comments »

Ladies Who Lunch

Posted by Lynnster on June 29, 2008

So today I met up with KathyT, her sister, and her youngest daughter for Huey Burgers (except Melissa had the Huey’s Club, the rest of us had the original Huey Burgers) and just had a fabulous time visiting with them. It’s always great to see Kathy, and her sister Karen is just delightful and funny as well. Melissa’s a really cool kid and is going home with a huge trophy – and is also getting her braces off soon, I hear. (Man, I remember that was one of the best days of my life, getting those things off for good after three long years.)

They had thought about going to Graceland but had decided not to, but they wanted to go to Mississippi since Karen and Melissa had never been, so that was a sort of easily solved two birds killed with one stone. I hopped into the van with them after lunch and we took off down Bellevue, which becomes Elvis Presley Blvd. and then becomes just plain old Highway 51 at the Tennessee-Mississippi state line. (Well, I guess it’s always Highway 51 anyway, but you know what I mean.)

So yeah, we went to Southaven and then even on down into Horn Lake, where Kathy bought a new headlight and the cute guy at Advance Auto Parts installed it for her even though he really didn’t want to.

Then we came back to Memphis, having driven past Graceland on the way down, but since it’s on that side of the road coming back – yeah, we pulled into the pull-off and got out and walked around the wall and gates a bit. Karen took a picture of me and Kathy and Melissa under the National Register of Historic Places sign that I hope will be so bad (because it no doubt will be of me, they always are) that Kathy won’t put it up on her blog. (Haha, just kidding… I think.) And Kathy took a bunch of pics of some of the graffiti on the wall.

Anyway, it was a lot of fun hanging out with them and thanks once again to Kathy for lunch & the company, I had a great time. And my dogs thank her profusely since virtually none of us finished our entire burger/sandwich or fries (I almost ate my whole Huey Burger but not quite), so Kathy sent me home with a literal doggie bag LOADED with french fries and what probably amounted to almost one entire Huey Burger or almost. It was a feeding frenzy the likes of which you usually only see in the wild on the Discovery Channel, Dobie almost took one or two of my fingers off.

What was really funny, though, was Daisy was the only one smart enough to figure out what I’d brought home in the box I was holding when I walked in the door. The boys were completely clueless (*rolls eyes*).

It was a gorgeous day in Memphis today, and since I was in the neighborhood I drove by my buddy Joey’s house thinking if they were outside I’d stop and say hey. But they weren’t, so I just headed on home after a stop off for needed Krogering.

By the way, I actually have a piece of Graceland in my possession – a piece of rock/stone that I think came from a walkway, I don’t think it came from the wall. My mom wound up with it when she was down here in college, I think a friend of hers actually did the actual deed, but yeah, it’s a piece of Graceland circa around 1961-63. Heh.

Posted in blogfolks, dobie is a dog, dogs, friends are good, fun with food, memphis, travelin', west tennessee | 1 Comment »

I Hope I Have Electricity Too

Posted by Lynnster on June 22, 2008

With a nod to ‘Coma for recently citing two of my favorite movies of all time, if I am stuck on a deserted island with nothing but a TV and a DVD player and only ten DVDs, I believe I can get by with these. In no particular order:

  1. River’s Edge – In the Nineties and pre-DVD days, I practically killed myself to get a VHS copy of this off eBay. Crispin Glover is a madman (in real life and on camera) – and was wonderful in the Back to the Future films – but he truly shines here in seriously disturbing and unnerving glory. Say what you will about Keanu Reeves, and yes, he’s played the same role a million times, but it suits him no better than in this film. The film is SUPPOSED to be disturbing and so are the characters. And to boot, it’s based on a true story. Side Trivia: Ione Skye Leitch, daughter of ’60s music icon Donovan, appears as Keanu’s love interest in the film, one of her first (Gas Food Lodging is another good one featuring her). She is also the ex-wife of Adam Horowitz of the Beastie Boys, and had a long-term live-in relationship with Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
  2. Heathers – Quite possibly my fave film of all time ever. Yeah, it’s starting to look a little dated now but that only adds to its charm nowadays. And the setting is Westerburg (sic) High School – need I say more? There are so many fabulous tongue-in-cheek in-jokes in this movie – the Heathers, Betty & Veronica, millions more – it’s just beautiful. Back in the days when I actually used to go OUT to the movies, I saw this one about five times in the theater in the same month. Side Trivia: Kim Walker, who played Heather Duke (the first dead Heather) was dating Christian Slater at the time, but they broke up during filming of the movie. Walker later developed a brain tumor and died in 2001 at the age of 32.
  3. Say Anything… – There have been few John Cusack movies I haven’t adored, but director Cameron Crowe’s Say Anything… is THE one. I have referenced Lloyd Dobler on this blog so many times over the years (as well as other Cusack films), I have a separate John Cusack category on the blog. I would have a super hard time picking a favorite scene, but my favorite is probably when Lloyd confronts the guys sitting outside the Gas ‘N Sip. Lili Taylor does a marvelous turn as well in this flick, and her songs about Joe (especially the one – you know the one) always have me in fits of giggles on the floor while watching. Side Trivia: Ione Skye also appears in this one, as Lloyd’s love interest Diane. The Replacement’s “Within Your Reach” is also notably featured in this film, which of course is another of the million reasons I fell in love with it so hard.
  4. Gremlins – I can’t even talk about how much I have always loved this movie without crying. I haven’t watched it in many, many years for the same reason. I first saw it while on summer vacation in a theater in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware in 1984. Side Trivia: Judge Reinhold & Phoebe Cates also appeared together in another fondly remembered for me film of the ’80s, Cameron Crowe’s (again) Fast Times at Ridgemont High. It’s not one of my very favorites and it’s certainly gotten dated, but it is still funny, especially if you grew up in the ’80s.
  5. Less Than Zero – Another, to borrow a phrase, ’80s “the kids are NOT all right” film, and another I practically paid an arm and a leg for to get a VHS copy of back in the ’90s. This one is akin to a John Hughes movie gone all wrong. It’s got its problems and on the surface would appear to be really out there as far as the whole wealthy and disaffected youth thing, but it’s really not as implausible as one would think. The details of the scenes themselves may have been different, but mainly due to geographics – the base story existed all over the country at the time, including Nashville. Side Trivia: Oh, James Spader, how despicable you are in this film, but how I adore you anyway and have in every film you’ve ever been in.
  6. Sid & Nancy – And thus begun the rest of my lifelong adoration of Gary Oldman as well. There are much better films he’s been in (and I love each and every one of them), but Alex Cox’s Sid & Nancy was his first big role, and there was just no one else who could have been a more perfect Sid Vicious. It’s the most disturbing and disgusting and sickening love story and everything punk was, a beautiful film in all its ugliness and has one of the best soundtracks ever. My friend Jen used to do the best Chloe Webb doing Nancy (”SIIIIIIIIID!”) that would have me rolling in the floor. Side Trivia: Look for an extremely young Courtney Love in a few scenes as one of Nancy Spungen’s pals.
  7. Drugstore Cowboy – I used to not think very highly of Matt Dillon as an actor until this one came out, and I became a fan of Gus Van Sant’s films on this one. Like many of my favorites, it’s disturbing and difficult to watch, but one of the greatest things about this film is that even though the story is pitiful and pathetic, Matt Dillon is SO funny in it. Under the surface of all the dirty drug addiction tale, this movie is hilarious. Also has an excellent soundtrack of gems from the time of the film’s setting, including The Count Five’s “Psychotic Reaction”, Desmond Dekker’s “The Israelites”, Gary Lewis & the Playboys’ “Judy in Disguise”, and Hazel, KY/slash/Puryear, TN (my home county) native Jackie DeShannon’s “Put a Little Love in Your Heart”. Van Sant’s My Own Private Idaho is also pretty good though a little faulty; this one is better. Side Trivia: Matt Dillon’s first big film role as a young teen was in another big all-time favorite of mine that has become a cult classic of sorts, Over the Edge – another one that has gotten very ’70s dated over time but still well worth watching, plus then-not-so-known Cheap Trick is largely featured on the soundtrack. As a commenter on iMDB noted, Over the Edge was “a teen movie that gets it right”.
  8. Dogs in Space – An Australian film you’ve probably never heard of and another disaffected youth mostly on drugs flick, but this time based in Melbourne’s post-punk scene of the late ’70s – and also based on more true stories, and starring – yes – the late Michael Hutchence of INXS. This film is such a favorite of mine I paid an extremely huge amount of money to get the VHS tape in the ’90s, and the last time I checked on DVD prices (which admittedly has been a few years now) it could be had for $200-350 – that price has probably gone down by now. Very much a “slice of life” flick and disturbing in places to watch, but it’s excellent and also has a soundtrack far beyond excellent – Iggy Pop, Nick Cave/Boys Next Door, Brian Eno, Gang of Four, and some more legends of the time as well as the fab tracks done by Hutchence and crew.  An iMDB commenter said, “This is for when you’re feeling like you need some company, but you don’t feel like venturing past your doorstep” – I agree.  Side Trivia: The real Sam Sejavka, who fronted Melbourne band The Ears in the late ’70s and is played by Hutchence in the film, appears in the movie twice and is addressed by Hutchence in the party scene as “Michael”.
  9. Quandary: Real Genius or The Doors – I can’t help it, I do love me some Val Kilmer, and if I could take another dozen or so films I’d be taking all the Val Kilmer films as well as the entire John Hughes oeuvre with me. Real Genius is so freakin’ hilarious through and through and I defy anyone to disagree with me. Oliver Stone’s epic The Doors has got its problems but it mostly gets it right and dang, Kilmer did such a dead-on Jim Morrison it’s almost creepy, I can’t help it, I think his performance in this film was brilliant. This was another I saw probably eight times or more while it was still first-run in the theater. Probably in the end, The Doors would win out, but jeez, it’d be a tough call. Side Trivia: Kilmer did most of the singing in the film himself and even the surviving Doors (Manzarek, Krieger, and Densmore) admitted they had a hard time telling the difference. So did I the first time I saw the film; I had no idea it wasn’t Jim Morrison’s vocals. On that basis alone, par excellence. Also look for a fairly large number of Doors associates and other scenesters of the time, including producer Paul Rothchild, Patricia Kennealy, singer Bonnie Bramlett, Eric Burdon of The Animals, and a Door himself – drummer John Densmore – in cameo appearances.
  10. Another tough call – Birdy or Platoon? – My decades-long adoration of and obsession with Matthew Modine is only barely outweighed by John Cusack and only slightly precedes James Spader, and having to decide between these two films is awful, though Birdy would probably win out in the end. This also meant I had to toss out another huge Modine favorite and an underappreciated and hugely funny one that probably doesn’t appear on many favorites lists, Married to the Mob. All three are fabulous films for their own reasons. Side Trivia: Having now mentioned Birdy, I also have to mention two more that didn’t make the cut – Valley Girl and Raising Arizona, all featuring Modine’s Birdy co-star Nicolas Cage, also good. Valley Girl, which was really Cage’s big film break, is worth it for The Plimsouls on stage alone. Wow, I first saw that one at the drive-in in 1983.

God, that was awful to try to choose ten and I still didn’t really succeed. Here are a few more – runners-up, I suppose – that didn’t make the final cut:

  1. Edward Scissorhands – I love this movie in all its goofy glory so much it makes me cry and it killed me to leave it off the list. In retrospect, I might have to swap one of the above for it. Side Trivia: Speaking of Tim Burton, there’s also Beetlejuice, of course.
  2. Pretty much all of the John Hughes Brat Pack-era movies (which you likely knew was coming) and Joel Schumacher’s St. Elmo’s Fire – It’d be a hard call, but St. Elmo’s Fire would be the first cut ‘cos it’s almost too cheesy. Some Kind of Wonderful and Pretty in Pink, I love but could live without. The Breakfast Club is, well, The Breakfast Club, but it’s not my very favorite. It’d come down to a tremendously agonizing tug of war between Sixteen Candles and Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, and I honestly don’t know which would win. Ferris would probably win, though. Even though – Side Trivia: John Cusack makes his second film appearance in a small part as one of the geeks in Sixteen Candles.
  3. Ciao! Manhattan – As much as I adore this, which is not so much a real film per se but more of a collection of some of the few remaining pieces of film footage of Warhol superstar Edie Sedgwick, as well as many other Factory scenesters, I just can’t justify it being one of the ten. Still, it’d be hard. Side Trivia: I hear the DVD, which I still don’t own, has loads of extra footage and modern commentary by some of the actors from what was supposed to have been the original film, and I’m dying to see it.
  4. Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains – Unless you had The Movie Channel or HBO in the early ’80s, you probably don’t know this film; it’s been out of print and unavailable for decades. I had a taped copy for years and the tape finally broke seven or eight years ago. This was one of Diane Lane’s earliest films and also features a very young Laura Dern. It’s an excellent film and, along with the aforementioned Over the Edge, is as responsible for my musical obsessions/addictions as any piece of recorded music is. I was pleasantly shocked and surprised to see co-star Ray Winstone’s name for the first time in years when he turned up in the multi-award winning Nil By Mouth in 1997. The good news is that after years of fans pleading, I got word the other day via MySpace that the film is finally going to be released on DVD and, in fact, the very next day got a notification from Amazon that the DVD was now available for pre-ordering. Side Trivia: Former Sex Pistols Steve Jones and Paul Cook, and former Clash bassist Paul Simonon, appear as the other members of the band in the movie led by Winstone.
  5. Pretty much every Kevin Smith and David Lynch film ever made – I can’t decide. I can’t, I can’t. Though I guess Dogma and Blue Velvet. Or maybe Chasing Amy and Eraserhead. Or… I can’t decide. Don’t make me.

God, that was painful. And it would really suck if there was no electricity on that island.

Posted in aussie music, blogfolks, extremely '80s, film fiend stuff, music, music junkie stuff | 2 Comments »

Tales from the Northwest Side

Posted by Lynnster on June 17, 2008

Since I was compelled to create a new category today called Squirrel Queen Tales, I am equally compelled to add the now-infamous Goosepond Swamp Monster legend to it, and link to the photo of where said Goosepond Monster lives.

Notice there’s no talk of Goosepondery over here.  But I’m still putting my money on ‘Coma.  If anyone can find the GSM, she can.

(Technically I guess the category should be ‘Coma tales, but seeing as how the category was begat of Squirrelly’s now-confirmed ice cream headache remedy that I impudently laughed at when I first heard it, plus Squirrel Queen Tales just sounds funnier…)

Posted in blogfolks, blogstuff, friends are good, giggles, squirrel queen tales, updates to the zone, weird wild & whoa!, west tennessee | 4 Comments »

Goals Are Overrated, Really

Posted by Lynnster on June 5, 2008

One of these days, I’m no longer going to have a host of old posts moved over from the old site that need to be edited and categorized. There’s still 274 of them, mostly from 1997 to 2000. I usually catch the old ones as they come up as hits in my blog stats and fix them then, but god, I can hardly stand to read that old stuff, especially, say, pre-2000 or thereabouts. Partially because there are so many posts about friends of mine who have been dead a pretty long time now, though one of these days I guess I will be glad I documented so much of those years.

But mainly I can’t stand to read them because those old posts just make me wince. For someone who was already (ok, barely) in her thirties when I started blogging in 1997, I find I was rather ridiculous and giggly and I just see some of that stuff and go “ewww”. Or “ugh”.

That’s a goal before I die, though, get all that old crap categorized and edited – edited meaning separated into logical paragraphs. I got lazy and more tired the more mammoth that chore of moving them became and just at some point quit trying to make it all pretty and moved them all in bulk and in big chunks. I mean, I was copying and pasting years and years’ worth of HTML entries. HTML. It was a pain.

And another goal is to get Sarcastro’s old photos re-uploaded to his now-not-that-new blog, still. (Says the Queen of Procrastination…)

Those are reasonable and reachable goals I think, probably unlike the other 5 million goals and projects on the list. I wish there were three or four or even five or six of me and maybe I could get some things FINISHED for a change.

Posted in blogfolks, blogstuff, in my head, lynnster logic, updates to the zone | Leave a Comment »

Bits & Pieces, Or Just Bits ‘Cos I Don’t Have Time for the Pieces Right Now

Posted by Lynnster on May 26, 2008

There’s just really no time to be spared, so pardon me for this hit & run update.

1. A little while ago, I ate a cheese Krystal – because I was badly in need of food that I could get quick and didn’t have to cook and it was 3 in the morning – and it was unbelievably, horribly, terribly, awfully & ungodly bad. I have never had a Krystal that tasted that disgustingly, putridly bad in my life. Yes, I realize that Krystals are not haute cuisine, but come on – it’s a Krystal. How can you screw up a Krystal that bad?? If I die in my sleep here in a little bit, you’ll know what happened. Blech. A shoe sole would have tasted better I think.

2. I’ve been eating entirely too much fast food lately anyway, which is kind of okay because I never eat anyway and all I ever get is, like, one little McDonald’s cheeseburger, and they’re all of a dollar and I DO NOT HAVE TIME to cook. But let’s not talk about the fact that in the past two weeks I’ve been served (A) a cheeseburger that was between two top buns, and (B) got home one day and opened the bag to discover I had a top & bottom bun with cheese in the middle – and no burger. Wake up, people! I know it’s just an unimportant $1.00 cheeseburger, but it might just be someone’s only meal of the day that you totally screw up.

3. I know I shouldn’t have laughed because they’re both elderly and one’s a little sickly and might be a bit senile, but watching not just one but two of my cats fall off the desk a few minutes ago, within a few minutes of each other, with an empty chip bag (the small 99-cent Big Grab size) on their heads was almost as funny as a few years ago when my elderly then-16-year old cat got his head stuck inside an empty Krystal Chik box.

4. On a not-as-amusing note, Maggie’s (same Maggie as in the pic above) new favorite place to nap is with her head on the edge of my keyboard, which usually eventually occurs to me at some point after being puzzled as to why I’m typing in all caps or ““““` is appearing on the screen again.

5. I am apparently now completely and totally assimilated into the electronic communications world at this point, because now that my fax AND my printer are both borked, and a fax that I needed to get where it needed to go so I could start getting some commission payments didn’t go through because that dinosaur of a mid-’90s era fax that I inherited from my old office is totally dead now… it took about a month for it to finally occur to me that I could just put a stamp on an envelope and MAIL it.

6. Besides the petered out fax and printer, now my desktop is apparently on its last legs too – I’ve known it was coming, was hoping to hold it off a little longer, seeing as how that’s pretty distressing since I do 100% of my work on this computer these days – but it spit out a frightening serious error at me the other day and threatened to not start (but it eventually did). In the course of seeing what I could afford to ditch in an effort to get it speeded up a little and prepare to defragment the drive for the first time in I dunno how long, after going through some other directories, I took note of the millions of Notepad files I’ve got saved to the desktop – and had a bit of a chuckle over the title of some of those files, such as: CLC Links Widget, WP Tutorial, Moved Blogs, kathyt, kathyt Links Widget, More Moved Blogs, B Blogger Template, one simply titled B, B Tutorial (yes, I don’t remember why I felt I needed to make her her own instead of giving her the one I gave everyone else), and Sarcastro Stuff (which reminds me yet again that I STILL need to repost all his old photos one of these days, ugh). Anyway, giggle – yeah, I’m a blog geek.

7. There are angels in the blogosphere and in my MySpacesphere too. Angels, I tell you.

8. I’m so tired I don’t have time to BREATHE, and I don’t have time anyway because I have way too much work and projects to do. This staying up for a day and a half at a time, sleeping a few hours and starting all over again is getting a little old. I’ve been up again for about 38 or 39 hours now and worked straight through for about 22 well, really about 29 or 30, of those, so yeah – ’scuse me if I’m a little loopy right now.

That is all. But seriously, if I don’t at least show up for a minute on Twitter by tonight? Food poisoning. Ugh, a nasty, dirty, filthy shoe sole would have no doubt tasted better. Yuck.

9. (Yes, Lesley and Brittney, I know I shouldn’t eat meat anyway.)

10. (But still – it’s a Krystal! How can anyone screw up a Krystal??)

11. Zzzzzz…

Posted in blah, blogfolks, blogstuff, cats, friends are good, fun with food, i never sleep, lynnster's zoo, my luck sucks, my so-called life, techgeekchick stuff, wordpress | 6 Comments »

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